Have you ever wondered if your prayers are actually heard? Do you question God's timing? You are not alone.
This past week, the world lost an amazing man. His name was Carman. Yes, the Carman that ministered through music that told a story. After a weird year of 2020, imagine the surprise of our tiny church when we were asked to host this legend in our sanctuary! We questioned our ability to make it happen, even had questions on it being wise during the current events. Yet, there we were.
Our church has seen the congregation dwindle over the years but my dad's sermons continue to be exactly what we need to hear. We go live on Facebook every Sunday morning.
Come be encouraged: Metro Christian Center
The Carman event happened. To see our sanctuary full again. To watch my parents clap and smile as they listened. To look around and watch as hands were raised, lives were saved, hope was poured out like an ocean of refreshing water on everyone there. It’s a time I hope I can always hold onto.
Even as someone who wasn’t close to him, it was such a heartbreaking moment to hear about his passing. I hurt for his crew. They were his family. I hurt for the small churches who were like us and preparing to welcome him. I hurt for the people who had already been inviting their loved ones to upcoming shows in hopes of bringing them closer to the Lord. I hurt for the ripple effect.
Yet, you know what I’m glad about? I’m glad the Lord saw our family and church worthy to host him back in October. I’m glad for the friendships we made and wouldn’t have otherwise had. I’m glad for the friends that attended and we hadn’t seen in years. I’m glad my children were able to meet him. I’m glad that because of that moment, we were able to sponsor 2 children from the Child Fund . If you are looking for a sign to do the same:
I find it so interesting to see when God is gonna show up. He sure never does it on our time, does he?
When I was a teenager, I loved – and still do – a gospel singer named Michael English. Sigh. I thought he was so handsome but the way his vocals just glided along in a song is something I am convinced the angels sound like! As everyone else on this earth, though, he made some mistakes. One was significant enough that he left the gospel music world for several years. I remember reading such hate from Christians. Harsh judgements. And these weren’t judgments out of caring about a fellow brother in Christ. Through the story of redemption, I had an answer to a long-time prayer that happened at the National Quartet Convention. It wasn't the place or time I thought it would be, and at the time I was doubting my prayers were even being heard, much less answered.
I was wrong.
I find that I can get so caught up in life. What’s going on with so-and-so, which current event is causing mass chaos, fear, and division, engulfed in the worries of not just myself but even people I don’t know! I cry out asking God to listen to my heart. I still struggle with questioning my abilities to be a good mom, a good wife, a good friend. I feel like such a failure in many areas of life.
Is there something you’re going through right now that you’re not sure how it’s going to turn out? Maybe you’re a parent and you are worried about your kids. You’re worried about their school situation. Something they seem to be having a difficult time with. Maybe you are afraid for them growing up in the world that you are raising them in.
Are you concerned about a health issue? Have you been praying for what seems like eternity about a situation? Are you looking at your life and just at the point of feeling exhausted with it all?
He knows your name. He knows your heart. And I am sure He has a plan that is better than anything you could imagine.
Take a breath.
Keep praying.
This WILL be okay.
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Hey there! Welcome to Imperfectly Pollyanna. A podcast where we have real and honest talk while finding the positive in the imperfections whether in homeschool, faith, health, or overall life. I am your host, Courtney, and I am SO glad you are here!
This past week the world lost someone who changed lives throughout the world. His name was Carman. Those of us that are Gen X or older have memories of his music, videos, and if you’re like me, a very first concert experience. I loved his story-telling talent. I’m such a story focused person. I te ach my own kids in stories. I think that people, in general, learn best through them. At least I know I do. The bible, itself, is full of stories. Jesus said he taught the masses through parables because that’s how they would understand. I loved that Carman always shared his ministry that way. He did these music videos that by today’s standards wouldn’t be impressive but at the time was a very forward-thinking way of ministry. Something else I remember about his concerts was that they were free. I think at one point he took love offerings. But other than that, if he took anything at all, it was his products and that was it. I know you’re probably thinking “ok that was when you were a child and now you are ___ years old” I tell you that because if you are new to getting to know me, this past October of 2020, we had an opportunity to host Carman at our church.
The question today is where is God when we pray?
Now, we used to be a large congregation. Every pew was full. We had a thriving youth group, active children’s ministry, we did musicals, special events, holyween, thanksgiving dinners, Christmas at the pastors house. I really loved Christmas at the pastors. As a young child it was because some of the members of the congregation would bring us gifts as the pastor’s kids. But as I got older, I loved being in the environment, the traditions, all the things. Over the course of years, as a lot of church’s experience, our congregation became smaller due to splits, members leaving, various situations. That’s not to say it has anything to do with my dad as the pastor, because despite me being partial, he is one of the best preachers, not to mention human beings, on this earth that I have ever known or heard. If you’ve not had the privilege to hear or meet him, I am actually going to put a link to our church’s fb page where we go live every Sunday morning. I just want to encourage you to go check him out because he is such a gift from the Lord.
Anyway, I promise I’m going somewhere with this. What happened was after the congregations dwindling over the years, then covid hit! Which caused us to become even smaller, despite many of our members tuning in online. We do have some that come in person. But it’s very small and we still have a huge church building. You know I have been sad to see my dad preach wonderful sermons and obvious words from the Lord to a congregation of 10. And I think, man, so many more people should be hearing him. However, the people that hear him are the people that are supposed to hear him. It’s not about the numbers.
So this past year, of course church’s saw cancelled services and online viewing increased. While commenting on a friend’s post back at the start of fall, my mom had someone reply to her wanting to connect via email. If that were most of us, we would think “uh, no way ya weirdo” but my mom, in all her innocent glory, sent an email to see what was up. The gentleman ended up being Carman’s booking agent and he shared that Carman was currently touring and wanting to minster in churches across the country. He asked if our church would be open to hosting. My mom very politely, in her southern charm, explained that while it was an honor to be asked, we were an extremely small church without a lot of capabilities to do something to that level. When he responded, he explained that Carman WANTED to come to our church, no matter the size. There was back and forth discussion, which I’ll save you from hearing, but it ended up that we said yes!
Over the course of the short time frame before Carman and his crew came, there was stress over how the ladies bathroom hadn’t been finished with its revamp, carpets weren’t clean, the parking lot needed repainted, so many things that we felt needed to be better….needed to be perfect…and then you add on to the concern from people about covid. The thing was, it all worked out. The bathroom didn’t get finished, the parking lot didn’t either. We had masks, temps taken, hand sanitizer for all. We saw people step up, people that didn’t even attend our church, to help with parking, man the doors, and help the crew unload and load equipment.
My dad was able to pick Carman up to bring him to the church. My husband helped with security. My daughter became instant friends with his manager’s daughter and the kids hung out the entire time. We became friends with some of the crew members. We had no idea how many people would show up but I can still see the line outside the doors. I can still picture the faces of people and the way everyone lit up just by being in a place of goodness, excitement of being with other people.
When the service began, emotions became almost overwhelming. See, I struggle with memory issues and it is something that can really bring me down. So when I have something that brings back a memory, it’s like a wave of both peace and electricity all at once. To see our sanctuary full again. To watch my parents clap and smile as they listened. To look around and watch as hands were raised, lives were saved, hope was poured out like an ocean of refreshing water on everyone there. It’s a time I hope I can always hold onto.
Fast forward to January and Carman had a routine surgery done and then complications began happening. Prayers went out and it seemed like all was going to turn out great. He was going to return to touring in March. Yet, he suddenly died in the hospital the day before he would be heading home.
Even as someone who wasn’t close to him, it was such a heartbreaking moment to hear about. I hurt for his crew. They were his family. I hurt for the small churches who were like us and preparing to welcome him. I hurt for the people who had already been inviting their loved ones to upcoming shows in hopes of bringing them closer to the Lord. I hurt for the ripple effect.
Whenever we lose someone we love, I think that’s one of the most difficult times to find something to be glad about.
Yet, you know what I’m glad about? I’m glad the Lord saw our family and church worthy to host him back in October. I’m glad for the friendships we made and wouldn’t have otherwise had. I’m glad for the friends that attended and we hadn’t seen in years. I’m glad my children were able to meet him. I’m glad that because of that moment, we were able to sponsor 2 children from the Child Fund and I’m telling you, it’s the best feeling to get an email from a child across the world and know you are making a difference in their life. See, Carman supported and promoted the Child Fund. He didn’t charge for you to attend his show. He offered an opportunity to love the children. To help be a part of something bigger than you. And isn’t that what life should be about? I’m going to put a link in the show notes if you’d like to take this as a sign to sponsor a child as well. You won’t regret it.
I find it so interesting to see when God is gonna show up. He sure never does it on our time, does He? I’d be like Stephanie Tanner on Full House and say “how rude” but His timing is perfect.
When I was a teenager, I loved – and still do – a gospel singer named Michael English. Sigh. I thought he was so handsome but the way his vocals just glided along in a song is something I am convinced the angels sound like! He sang both as a solo artist but also was a part of groups such as the Gaither Vocal Band. Man, that’s some talent among that group, am I right? As everyone else on this earth, though, he made some mistakes. One was significant enough that he left the gospel music world for several years. I remember reading such hate from Christians. Harsh judgements. And these weren’t judgments out of caring about a fellow brother in Christ.
At the time, I was personally struggling with my own faith. I was mourning the loss of my best friend, struggling with typical teenager angst, and worrying over another friend of mine who was doing everything he could to run from God. I prayed. I prayed for Michael English. I prayed for my friend. I prayed and prayed and prayed. Yet I felt like my prayers weren’t heard. After all, if they were heard, then surely God would answer them, right? Surely God cared enough about me and them to change hearts, right?
We used to go to an event called the National Quartet Convention. It was full of southern gospel groups and solo artists, coming to together for a weekend of music. You could go around to different vendor booths and meet them, buy products, and listen to talent after talent. It was a great time! Then, the fall of my senior year of highschool, we went to the convention. I can remember hearing rumors that Michael was there in the building. I also remember listening to all the artists and praying for God to please let him be there. I prayed for God to either bring Michael back or my friend. I prayed for God to just DO SOMETHING if He even cared about me or was listening. Have you ever tried making deals with God? Ha. Bless our hearts.
So, as I’m standing in the stadium, Bill Gaither was up on stage and speaking. I had this underlying feeling that something was happening. I found myself filling with hope and tears began burning my eyes and I started searching the shadows down among the crowd seated around the stage. Bill Gaither began speaking about the story of the prodigal son. I knew what was happening. And there, in the darkness, a figure came walking up and it was Michael English. I stood with the crowd, clapping, tears running down my face, as he shared his testimony of redemption. I’m happy to report that Michael is still serving the Lord. In fact, he just released a cd and dvd combo that I have yet to get.
God knew what each person needed that day, even 17-year-old me. He had always been listening. He just had a better plan. He had the perfect plan.
I’m sure glad that God sees the big picture. He knows what we need, when we need it, and how we need it.
I find that I can get so caught up in life. What’s going on with so-and-so, which current event is causing mass chaos, fear, and division, engulfed in the worries of not just myself but even people I don’t know! I cry out asking God to listen to my heart. I still struggle with questioning my abilities to be a good mom, a good wife, a good friend. I feel like such a failure in many areas of life.
Have you ever wondered if God heard your prayers? Have you questioned what you’re actually doing with your life?
As a church, especially our family, we have felt alone many times. We’ve watched as people have come in and out of our lives. We’ve bore the weight of wondering where money would come from in order to pay the electric bills. My parents have gone without paychecks many times over the last several years because what money did come in, it went towards bills. It all seems unfair until you see that they’ve never gone without a roof over their head or food on the table. Somehow, things get taken care of. While some people have left our lives, others have come in at the perfect time…a God-send…to offer help, encouragement, an answered prayer.
See, we didn’t see ourselves as having the ability to host someone like Carman. I didn’t think God heard me as young girl.
I didn’t think I was capable of teaching my children through homeschool.
I thought I had made so many mistakes in my life that I could never be used by God.
I thought the things that I saw as negative…my imperfections…
All these negative thoughts. What I was really doing was LIMITING God. Actually, I’m not that powerful. But hopefully you know what I mean.
I have made many mistakes in my life. Yet God continues to show up for me. And He will show up for you.
Is there something you’re going through right now that you’re not sure how it’s going to turn out? Maybe you’re a parent and you are worried about your kids. You’re worried about their school situation. Something they seem to be having a difficult time with. Maybe you are afraid for them growing up in the world that you are raising them in.
Are you concerned about a health issue? Have you been praying for what seems like eternity about a situation? Are you looking at your life and just at the point of feeling exhausted with it all?
Will you listen to me for a few seconds longer? I want to tell you that this will be okay. You are seen. You are loved. You will be provided for. You have not been forgotten.
He knows your name. He knows your heart. And I am sure He has a plan that is better than anything you could imagine.
Take a breath.
Keep praying.
This WILL be okay.
**I am needing your help. Has this podcast spoken to you? I am hoping it finds its way to someone who may be needing some encouragement with her faith, homeschool, health or life. If that’s you, you’ve found a friend. If you have someone in mind that might relate, or you have been touched in something shared, would you mind sharing it? The way a podcast gets traffic is through word of mouth and I would sure appreciate it. You can also leave a review or rating if the platform you listen on offers that as an option.
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Remember, you are loved and I am GLAD you are here. See you next time!